63 Funny Science Jokes: 2020 Edition

Science, Jokes
Share Tweet This! Email

Our List of Very Funny Science Jokes

Let me be clear up front, I am a Dad, and so this list of funny science jokes could just be dad jokes in disguise ๐Ÿ˜†

Never the less, please let us share with your our favourite science jokes. Hopefully, they are funny enough to induce some laughter or at minimum a little smile. If you find these jokes amusing, please make sure to share this list with your friends and fellow scientists. ๐Ÿ™

One last thing, here at STEM Mayhem, we are family-friendly. All of these science jokes will be safe for kids. ๐Ÿ‘จโ€๐Ÿ‘ฉโ€๐Ÿ‘งโ€๐Ÿ‘ฆ

Our List of Very Funny Science Jokes

63 Funny Science Jokes ๐Ÿคฃ

No matter how popular they get, Antibiotics will never go viral! ๐Ÿ’Š

Why are Helium, Curium, and Barium the medical elements?
Because if you can't heal-ium or cure-ium, you bury-um. โšฐ๏ธ

Why is the ocean so salty?
Because the land doesn't wave back. ๐ŸŒŠ

I was reading a book on helium... Couldn't put it down. ๐Ÿ“–

What should you do when no one laughs at your science jokes?
Keep trying until you get a reaction. ๐Ÿ˜‚

A couple of months in the laboratory can frequently save a couple of hours in the library. ๐Ÿ“š

Google-Earth gave you the opportunity to go and see anywhere in the world. So what do you do?
You go and look at your house? ๐Ÿก

An interesting paradox: Noses run but feet smell. ๐Ÿ‘ƒ

I think I left the Bromine and Boron in the cabinet.
BrB ๐Ÿƒโ€โ™‚๏ธ

Why is the pH of YouTube very stable?
Because it constantly buffers. โ–ถ๏ธ

Why do chemists like nitrates so much?
Theyโ€™re cheaper than day rates. ๐ŸŒ™

Why do centipedes have 100 legs?
So they can walk. ๐Ÿ‘ฃ๐Ÿ‘ฃ๐Ÿ‘ฃ๐Ÿ‘ฃ๐Ÿ‘ฃ๐Ÿ‘ฃ

What do you call an acid with an attitude?
A mean-oh acid. ๐Ÿ˜ 

If you broke the law of gravity, would you get a suspended sentence? ๐Ÿ”ผ

Did you hear the one about the recycling triplets?
Their names are Polly, Ethel, and Ian. โ™ป๏ธ

One mouse to another:
โ€œLook at that lady with the white coat on. Whenever I push the paddle, she starts writing something.โ€ ๐Ÿญ

When Magnesium and Oxygen started dating I was like, "O MG!" ๐Ÿ˜ฒ

A chemist walks into a pharmacy and asks the pharmacist, โ€œDo you have any acetylsalicylic acid?โ€
โ€œYou mean aspirin?โ€ asked the pharmacist. โ€œThatโ€™s it! I can never remember that word.โ€ ๐Ÿค”

Why does a burger have less energy than a steak?
A burger is in its ground state. ๐Ÿ”

Unknown Fact: You can be cooled to -273.15C and be 0K. ๐Ÿ˜จ

A photon checks into a hotel and is asked if he needs help with his luggage.
"No, I'm travelling light." ๐ŸŒž

Why did the Physics Teacher break up with the Biology teacher?
There was no Chemistry. ๐Ÿ’”

If the Silver Surfer and Iron Man team up, theyโ€™d be alloys. ๐Ÿ”ฉ

What did one ion say to the other?
I've got my ion you. ๐Ÿ‘

Do scientists who study the sun have a flare for research? ๐Ÿ”†

I have a new theory on inertia but it doesnโ€™t seem to be gaining momentum. ๐ŸŽข

One tectonic plate bumped into another and said, "Sorry, my fault.". ๐ŸŒŽ

What is a physicist's favourite food?
Fission chips. ๐ŸŸ

When all you want to do is gain potential energy...
People just keep letting you down. ๐Ÿ˜ฅ

Did you hear oxygen went on a date with potassium?
It went OK. ๐Ÿ‘Œ

If you are thinking about telescopes as a hobby, you should look into it. ๐Ÿ”ญ

What did the thermometer say to the graduated cylinder?
You may have graduated, but I've got many degrees. ๐ŸŒก

Did you hear the joke about Sodium hypobromite?
NaBrO. ๐Ÿ‘Š

A physicist while exiting the theatre after seeing Star Wars bumped into a fellow physicist. Inspired by the movie, he said to his friend, โ€œMay the mass times acceleration be with you.โ€ ๐Ÿ“ฝ

Einstein developed a theory about space.
It was about time too. ๐Ÿ•‘

Are you a carbon sample? I would love to date you. ๐Ÿ˜

Whatโ€™s the difference between a dog and a marine biologist?
One wags a tail and the other tags a whale. ๐Ÿณ

A dung beetle walks into a bar and says, "Is this stool taken?" ๐Ÿ’ฉ

There are two types of people in the world:
Those who can extrapolate from from incomplete data. ๐Ÿ“‹

A group of protesters out front of a physics lab:
โ€œWhat do we want? - Time travel; When do we want it? - Irrelevant.โ€ ๐Ÿ•—

Where does bad light end up?
In a prism. ๐Ÿ‘ฎโ€โ™€๏ธ

Learning about Frequency is so boring it Hertz! ๐Ÿ”ˆ

What kind of dog does a chemist have?
A Lab-radore. ๐Ÿถ

Do you want to know how often I tell element jokes?
Periodically. ๐Ÿ—“

Bacteria is the only culture some people have. ๐Ÿฐ

Whatโ€™s wrong with a joke involving Cobalt, Radon, and Ytterium?
It's CoRn Y. ๐Ÿคช

Biologists take 'Cellfies'. ๐Ÿ“ธ

How do astronomers organize a party?
They planet. ๐ŸŒ

A couple of biologists had twins. They named one Jessica and the other Control. ๐Ÿ‘จโ€๐Ÿ‘ฉโ€๐Ÿ‘ฆโ€๐Ÿ‘ฆ

Did you hear about the man who got cooled to absolute zero?
He's 0K now. โ„๏ธ

In theory, there is no difference between theory and practice. But, in practice, there is. ๐Ÿ™„

How does the moon cut his hair?
Eclipse it. ๐Ÿ’‡โ€โ™‚๏ธ

Did you hear about the famous microbiologist who visited 20 different countries and spoke 6 languages?
He was a man of many cultures. ๐Ÿ—ฝ๐Ÿฏ

Two blood cells met and fell in love. Alas, it was all in vein. ๐Ÿ˜

Organic chemistry is difficult. Those who study it have alkynes of trouble. ๐Ÿ‘ฉโ€๐Ÿ”ฌ

What do you call a tooth in a glass of water?
A one molar solution. ๐Ÿšฐ

The cost of the space program is astronomical. ๐Ÿš€

How much room do fungi need to grow?
As mushroom as possible. ๐Ÿ„

R.I.P. Boiled Water
You will be mist. ๐Ÿ’€

Did you know they have just found the gene for shyness?
They would have found it earlier, but it was hiding behind two other genes. ๐Ÿ˜

I heard today that the molecular formula for water is no longer H2Oโ€ฆโ€ฆ itโ€™s now HIJKLMNO ๐Ÿ’ง

When the astronomy department found out their professor was not getting the Nobel prize this year, they decided to hold a party for him anyway and give him a constellation prize instead. โญ๏ธโญ๏ธโญ๏ธ

Why can you never trust atoms?
They make up everything! ๐Ÿ˜Ž

Source for Our Science Jokes

My wife has a science degree and medicine degree, and she helped me with a few. Others I had heard over time and others turned up on Facebook or Twitter. So I guess we aren't sure where they originated, and if you were the original person who made up the joke, I can only apologise for not linking to you.

Read Next